I've never been one who makes resolutions. I used to half-heartedly try to do it every New Year's Eve. Exercise, eat right, less drinking, more structure, blah blah blah, but by January 2nd I was already cheating and cringing every time I caught myself in the mirror. The last decade or so I stopped trying.
For the past few years I've watched from the sidelines as some of my friends have adopted a new tradition of embracing a word for the year instead. A word to live by, so to speak. I admired this idea. And still, I was fairly certain it was just a sneaky way to get me to make a resolution.
And it is. Sort of. But the idea intrigues me anyway. So this year, I'm choosing the word PRESENT, or in reality the phrase "to be present" and I'm combining it with . . . you guessed it, a resolution! I am going to write a poem a day for the entire year. I won't be sharing them here in this space, not all of them anyway, that's too much pressure. And a lot of them are going to be crap. I mean total garbage. But the point isn't so much the poem that transpires, but the new way I'll be looking at the world. To be present in the moment, in the minutia, in the everydayness of my life. To start seeing things differently. To ground myself in my present, rather than looking back at the past (with regret) or projecting into a future I can never see.
Reflecting on the smallest details.
Delighting in my surroundings.
Savoring them in a different way, as I leave a trail of poems behind me.
My friend, Allison, has agreed to do it with me. And being accountable to someone else is HUGE in my book. It will help keep me going on the days I feel like I can't pick up a pen. I'll picture her sitting in her treehouse scribbling away and I'll jump to it, even if it's the last thing I want to do because I won't want to disappoint her. And then suddenly I'll realize I don't want to disappoint me either.
I like it.
It's already January 2nd. Two poems written. Still looking myself in the eye in that mirror...